SWTOR - Doomsday
by nobarawolfgirl
Summary: After an attack from her Inquisitor sister Ved'ma, Cipher Nine/Agent Kieyla and Seyje decide its safer for Sanju to defect, forcing the couple to permanently part ways. Title is based off the "Doctor Who" episode where *spoilers* Rose and the Doctor are separated forever. *end-spoilers*


The agent stood there trembling as the tears poured down her face. She didn't care that they knew. Let the whole world know for all it mattered now. The secret she had been trying to hide for so long was ripped out into reality by the claws of a maniac that cared nothing about the consequences created.

"That's it then? There's nothing else we can do?" she whispered, barely managing to find the words.

Kieyla glanced up at her sister's torn expression, ignoring everyone else standing around them. Seyje was struggling to keep her composure, but kept it well hidden.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. "This is the only way to guarantee his safety."

A new wave of tears shed themselves from the Cipher's eyes as she looked to the ground, trying futilely to contain her pain. How could she possibly go through with this? Defeating Jadus seemed like a cakewalk compared to the emotional minefield that she was now laying down for herself – and didn't want to walk across.

"There has to be another way."

"Kieyla," Seyje sighed.

"No, there has to be! I can't do this, I won't!" Kieyla shouted.

This wasn't right. She was supposed to be detached from her work, not having a complete breakdown over one person.

And yet…

"Kieyla, please. Listen to them."

The masculine murmur was like a calm breeze into her raging soul. It was the voice of reason from someone, possibly the only one, who earned her trust. And her heart.  
A reassuring hand was placed on her shoulder, and Kieyla turned around to look into the amber-flecked eyes she had fallen in love with not so long ago. Had it only been a year and half? It felt so much longer. To return to his planet under such circumstances was like shoving glass down her throat.

"Sanju," she whimpered softly as he tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear.

Had his touch always felt so distant? Like the gentle whisper of a ghost?

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. An embrace she had been thirsting for since the day she left now felt like poison in her veins. Kieyla nuzzled her forehead against his neck, breathing in the familiar scent of smoke that came from living near a warzone.

"You can't just leave me," she whispered into his ear. "I don't care what they say, they can't do this."

Sanju grasped her shoulders and pulled away so she could look at him. He wore a serious expression, but she could see the pain behind his eyes.

"Kieyla, I would travel across this galaxy and the next thousand if it meant staying with you…"

_Then do it, damn it!_

"But I can't."

Kieyla turned her head away, unable to look at him as she tried stifling her sobs. This couldn't be happening.

_They warned us about relationships in Intelligence. Damn me for not listening. _

"Why can't you just join my crew and stay with me? I could hide you, protect you!" Kieyla begged.

"You know why we can't do that Kieyla," Seyje interjected as she took two steps towards them. "Your work would be compromised by worrying about him all the time, and Intelligence would remove you faster than a hyperspace jump."

"And what's so wrong with that?" the agent demanded, turning to face her sister. "Maybe then I could have a chance at a normal life – away from all the lying, the blackmailing, the secrets."

"Kieyla, don't–"

"We could move to Dromund Kaas or Alderaan or to Voss like our parents did when they had to flee."

"That's enough!" Seyje snapped as her arm outstretched.

Kieyla's voice cut off as she felt the power of the Force around her throat. It shocked her to silence. She had seen Seyje choke other people with her abilities before, but they had never been used on her.

"Think about it, Kieyla," the Sith snarled as she released her sister. "Regardless of whether you stay in Intelligence or not – as long as Sanju is in the Empire, Ved'ma will be able to track him down and try to kill him again."

Kieyla froze. The mere mention of the incident made her blood run cold with terror and burn with rage at the same time.

Only a few hours ago she had been blackmailed by her psychotic Inquisitor sister into bringing Doctor Lokin to Balmorra so he could construct a protective serum against the collicoids for her. She used Sanju as a hostage, threatening to kill him, and Kieyla couldn't refuse. How Ved'ma found out about their relationship was unknown and unsettling. When the Sith left to retrieve a holocron of sorts, Kieyla had contacted Seyje and begged for help since she predicted Ved'ma would no doubt lie about setting Sanju free. She had been right. Seyje caught Ved'ma off-guard upon her return and used a truth serum created by Quinn to find the location of Sanju. When they successfully subdued Ved'ma and finally found Sanju's holding place, it was an unpleasant sight. She had clearly unleashed her wrath upon him, causing more physical than mental damage.

"And what makes you think the Republic will be able to protect him any better than I can?" Kieyla demanded.

Seyje pulled a holocom out of her robes and an image of their Trooper sister Katlyn appeared.

"As the commander of Havoc Squad, I can guarantee no harm will come to him here. I personally will see to it," she said in her usual military tone.

Kieyla's eyes narrowed.

"Your work is just as demanding as mine."

"Yes," Katlyn agreed. "But Sanju wouldn't be the first defector I've met. I've got a soldier in my crew that could assist him through the process. He'll be in good hands."

The agent raised a brow.

"Who is it?" she asked curiously.

"Sergeant Elara Dorne."

Kieyla heard someone inhale sharply behind her, and she glanced back to see Quinn's face flushed red. The suspicion was clear on Seyje's face as she realized there was something significant about this 'Elara' person to her officer. It was unknown to Seyje that Kieyla had known Quinn while at the Academy and attempted to pursue him there, but had been unsuccessful due to his occupying relationship. Now everything was clear to her.

_It was Elara. She and Quinn must've dated while they were at the Academy. No wonder he only failed one assignment while he was there. The day Colonel Thorus changed their assignment was the day she disappeared. _

It suddenly dawned on her that Sanju would be in the presence of that same woman – the one who kept Quinn out of Kieyla's grasp.

"I don't approve of that at all," the agent snarled.

The atmosphere thickened considerably. Sanju opened his mouth to speak, but Kieyla held a finger to his lips for silence.

"But considering the circumstances and lacking options..." she said, catching Sanju's gaze.

The room fell silent, waiting desperately for the words that would shatter the future as they looked at each other. These were the last fleeting moments the agent wanted to hold onto before her world was turned upside down; that quirky smile, that laugh that told her everything was going to be alright, that look of pure love in his eyes…

"I guess this is for the best."

Gone.

It was over.

After one last passionate and sorrowful kiss, Sanju was led away by Seyje and her companions. The Twi'lek and Padawan were on the verge of tears as they left. Quinn was shaken up, but it barely showed.

As the group walked to the other side of the spaceport where Seyje's ship was waiting in the hangar, Sanju paused and looked back. He waved his hand and mouthed the words

_'__I love you.'_

_'I love you too.'_

_'Goodbye.'_

He disappeared from sight.

"Goodbye…" Kieyla sobbed to herself.

The journey back to her ship was a blur. She didn't remember how she got into her quarters or when they took off. She hadn't been flying, had she? Hopefully not.

The days dragged out, and her crew left her alone in her room. 2V-R8 came in a few times to change the soaked pillows and offer her food, but she had no appetite and quickly lost track of time as her senses dulled.

One day, a knock at her door startled her out of a daze. She sat up in bed, her hair disheveled and her clothes wrinkled. The door hissed open, and to her surprise, Vector stood in the entrance. Kieyla sniffed back tears and combed a hand through her hair.

"Do you need something, Vector?" she croaked, her throat dry and thick from lack of use.

"Agent, we..."

"Yes?"

This was odd. Her Joiner companion never paused or fumbled with thoughts. He was usually more prepared than she was.

"We were wondering what we might do to help. After ten days of being alone, we thought you could use company," he offered.

Kieyla stared at him in confusion as her hazy mind tried to catch up on its normally active calculations. When it finally registered in her brain, her jaw dropped.

"Ten days? Are you sure?"

"Indeed Agent. We tried reaching out before, but you would not listen."

The Cipher vaguely remembered screaming at someone to leave her alone. She groaned as she stood up, stretching her unused muscles. It felt strange being on two feet again, a telltale sign of what Kieyla had been doing the past week.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shout," she apologized as she started tidying up the messing room.

Clothes, blankets, bottles, and some strange looking dustballs littered the floor. Something the droid could handle once he came in.

"Quite alright, agent. We understand," Vector replied calmly.

Kieyla paused and glanced up at him curiously.

"What would you possibly understand about breakups?" she asked in a harsher tone than she intended.

Vector didn't seem to notice.

"The Hive has seen and learned many things throughout the millennium, including relationships," he replied coolly.

"I don't suppose you have any advice on how to handle loosing someone," she remarked with slight sarcasm.

Kieyla stared at him for a moment, but Vector remained silent. With a resigned sigh, the agent went about her room and focused on cleaning. By the stars, her quarters really were a disaster.

"There's a difference between goodbye and letting go."

The agent stopped and looked intently at Vector.

"Goodbye means you hope to see him again. Letting go means you know you won't. You've said your goodbye, Agent. Now you need to let him go."

Vector turned and walked out, leaving Kieyla alone in shock. His answer is not at all what she was expecting, but perhaps he had a point. Kieyla knew she was never going to see Sanju again, but accepting that after everything they had been through was hard…really hard.

_I guess trying to move on without letting go is no different than trying to live in the past. It can't be done. _

The agent walked to the open doorway of her room and looked down the hall where Vector had gone. His advice meant more than she had expected, and he had already proven himself an extremely valuable asset to her. Maybe Sanju's defection wasn't the end of her love life.

_Maybe I have something to look forward to after all._


End file.
